Repent and Witness

Many of you by this title would think that my message is to others but this is a message to me. Repent and witness. Today I had a plan. I was going to Oakland to read the sermon on the Mount It was Sermon on the Mount Saturday. Over 100 people would be doing this same thing today and then I was going to my Mom's roommates birthday. I for some reason thought it was not going to be too hard to read the sermon on the Mount. I just had to read it and did not have to memorize anything. I practiced at home and my biggest issues was the pages of the new thinline Bible that I had bought were flipping over in the wind and I was afraid it was going to rain on me and I did not want to get my new Bible wet. I printed out the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7) and put the sheet into those plastic sheet protectors. I got to Oakland and none of my partners were going to be there. I had hoped they would be there just one of them. I had to walk about the block two times to get up the courage to do it. I decided to hand out some tracts and then I witnessed to a Asian guy to help me get into the swing of things. I set up my stool and could not get up on that stool. I picked up the stool and walked around the block again. I prayed God give my your spirit and transform me. Well a guy asked me for Change and I told him that I did not have any I had given it to the Marines at Walmart. I had a $20 bill and thought that is not change. I should have given him some money. (the sermon on the mount says I should and I did not) I then came back to the intersection that I was going to preach at and the spot that I feel comfortable in is under construction. So then I spent time thinking about where to setup. Finally I just walked over and put the stool down and got on top. Then I was asked by a guy if I needed help. He thought I was putting the papers in my hand on the pole. I thanked him.

I have not shook like this in a long time. Matthew 5-7 takes a long time to read. I had my bullhorn in my bag and a mic that i hold in my hand and I was reading along. It was hard to see the paper with my hand shacking. I was glad it was not the small print of the Bible. I did not look up I just had the 240 Watt bullhorn up to 8 it goes from 0-10 and read. My hand hurt from pushing the button and my mouth went totally dry. When I was done I got down and was afriad I would fall down. There was a group in a mini van behind me that had watched this entire thing. They called me over and wanted to know what I was up to. They said that they could not hear but were amazed at what I was doing. They wanted to know what I had been saying up there. They told me that they wanted to walk up to me and have me turn around but they did not want to scare me. Praise the Lord that they did not tape me on the shoulder or come up to me I might have fainted. I pulled the printout out of the sheet protectors and gave it to one of the girls and she started to read it. I handed out gospel tracts to everyone else in the van and they were very excited. I then walked straight to my car and another person came up to me and I gave them a gospel tract too. I turned out to be quite the curiosity. I must have shook for an hour afterward.

I went to my moms house and before I walked in I said I am not going to witness to anyone tonight. I do not want to upset anyone on their birthday. I had my What if shirt on and did not think about that. My mothers roommate whom I have never witnessed to asked me What if what? I told her What if you died today would you go to heaven or Hell. She pointed up and said I hope. I said Wow. that is it. I am prepared to give a reason for the hope that is within me. I did not. It was her birthday and I thought I did not come here to upset her. Then I went into the bathroom to pray and ask for forgiveness. How cruel not to tell her she is not going to heaven. I had my chance and did not. Ten minutes later my aunt asks me the same thing. I said what if you died today what would happen? she said oh wow. I did not witness to my unsaved aunt. The entire reason I made this tie dye What if shirt is so my loved ones would bring up the things of God and it had worked and I did not witness to them.

Accourding to the sermon on the mount I can not judge anyone that does not witness since I had my chance to witness to the two people who have been on my heart and I did not. Judge not others or you will be judged by that same standard. I did not witness to them. I have to repent and witness to them. It was a night of fear for me.

It brings tears to my eyes. I am humbled.